"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
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