I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
