Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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