I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
