areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
