Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?

(1-978): View more from Massachusetts

Nah. I did too.

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(706): View more from Georgia

Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.

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25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
Read it at the TFLN blog
(518): View more from New York

I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much

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(212): View more from New York

I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.

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(301): View more from Maryland

His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.

(1-301): View more from Maryland

I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.

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(613): View more from Ontario

You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset

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(708): View more from Illinois

BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY

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