I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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