i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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