Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
