Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
