how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
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It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
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it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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