I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
