just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Someone came in the potted fern
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
