You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
