well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
