I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
