it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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