I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
