I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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