Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Randomize
