Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
