Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
There's a naked man in my car right now.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize