Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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