Whoa Z and x make the same sound
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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