My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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