we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
