I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
