im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize