in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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