you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Randomize
