I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize