i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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