I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
