We're like a lot better than the average bears
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Randomize
