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  • 89 52
    Submitted by chw63 on Jul 13, 10 at 7:27pm

    the onion had a pretty good headline: Steinbrenner fires his heart

  • Submitted by whiteknave on Jul 13, 10 at 5:12pm

    What makes you think that he's in Heaven?

  • 87 72
    Submitted by BruGz on Jul 13, 10 at 6:28pm

    if God was really a Sox fan, would he let them go on an 86 year drought? i've heard of tough love, but thas goin too far

  • 77 63
    Submitted by jasboo on Jul 13, 10 at 5:00pm

    you know he's gonna try to fire St. Peter from the front gates if he's kept waiting to long...

  • 60 43
    Submitted by AmishRobot on Jul 13, 10 at 5:27pm

    THE BOSS.

  • 57 50
    Submitted by ilikeyourbeard11 on Jul 13, 10 at 10:19pm

    i'm confused, who's that?

  • 57 63
    Submitted by hjifg on Jul 13, 10 at 6:27pm

    Yeah...this was on Twitter early this morning. So congrats for posting someone else's cleverness as your own.

    • 50 74
      Submitted by Xander03 on Jul 13, 10 at 7:55pm

      who says that he wasn't the one who posted it on twitter?

  • 43 41
    Submitted by Ninjavitis on Jul 14, 10 at 5:04pm

    Zombie worshiper.

  • 56 67
    Submitted by daynalareyna on Jul 13, 10 at 8:36pm

    @dilorenzo: let me translate what anonymous is trying to say, since you seem to be a tad slow: what whiteknave meant was that he might rather be in hell than in heaven. d'uh. now go sit in a corner and never dare to speak again.

  • Submitted by 110340 on Jul 13, 10 at 4:58pm

    A lot of these aren't even actual texts. Just people with clever ideas. I bet only like one fourth of these are actual received texts.

    • 59 56
      Submitted by RazzleRack on Jul 14, 10 at 12:44am

      Yet here you are, reading them and then bitching about them.

  • 50 61
    Submitted by nimh on Jul 16, 10 at 12:18am

    Ahahahahahahahaha fuck yuuuu wwhhale

  • 40 43
    Submitted by dawninbloom on Jul 14, 10 at 1:26pm

    I lol'd

  • 52 68
    Submitted by guberjr on Jul 13, 10 at 9:50pm

    Steinbrenner's a dick, just like the rest of the Yankees!

  • 41 50
    Submitted by callmescout on Jul 14, 10 at 4:14am

    Either that or he will fire the whole Holy Trinity and then rehire them next Holy season.

  • 50 69
    Submitted by awesomesaucechk on Jul 13, 10 at 4:17pm

    Hope he buzzes

  • 46 63
    Submitted by sweetteammm on Jul 16, 10 at 10:05pm

    Latest News: Steinbrenner just bought out the angels...

  • 46 63
    Submitted by mycoolname on Jul 14, 10 at 12:43pm

    Steinbrenner definitely isn't in heaven. And Jesus isn't anyones bitch.

  • 38 48
    Submitted by anonmyous on Jul 13, 10 at 8:01pm

    @dilorenzo, you're fucking retarded.

  • 45 63
    Submitted by bankachic on Jul 13, 10 at 4:59pm

    Let's hope they don't do to him , what they did to Ted Williams ....

  • 37 48
    Submitted by kaitlinmohr on Jul 13, 10 at 4:52pm

    hahahahahaha epic.

  • 42 60
    Submitted by Fireproof on Jul 14, 10 at 12:15am

    Just like you know where.....

  • 57 91
    Submitted by Danny66 on Jul 13, 10 at 5:24pm

    Not even remotely funny, fucking dumb

  • 51 80
    Submitted by thohug on Jul 13, 10 at 5:30pm

    This made me lol

  • 38 55
    Submitted by jelloskin09 on Jul 14, 10 at 4:03am

    @memyself: Actually, historically Jesus was a very real person. As to whether or not you believe he is the savior for mankind is a different topic all together. How about forming a brain before you fucking speak again, you imbecile. K, thanks.

  • 34 49
    Submitted by lifesavergrl on Jul 14, 10 at 3:21am

    That is fucking genius.

  • 50 81
    Submitted by firsty on Jul 13, 10 at 9:41pm

    these pretzels are making me Firsty

  • 51 85
    Submitted by stepdog on Jul 13, 10 at 5:11pm

    Don't lie no way is that guy getting into heaven

  • 35 55
    Submitted by dilorenzo on Jul 13, 10 at 7:27pm

    @whiteknave. He died of a heart attack this morning you fuckwit.

    • 37 56
      Submitted by whiteknave on Jul 13, 10 at 11:27pm

      This isn't twitter. You can reply to my post directly.

  • Submitted by hockeybabe on Jul 13, 10 at 5:26pm

    God is a red sox fan, sorry

  • Submitted by memyself on Jul 13, 10 at 6:20pm

    If Jesus were real =)

  • 32 57
    Submitted by Vintageboyy on Jul 13, 10 at 7:22pm

    This monkey's gone to heaven

  • 33 64
    Submitted by daynalareyna on Jul 13, 10 at 8:38pm

    oh, it's "anonmyous"... hehe. well, i hope dilorenzo still gets it. although...

  • 35 72
    Submitted by dilorenzo on Jul 13, 10 at 8:45pm

    @dayfag. Go fuck yourself. Comprende?