What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
