Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
