that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize