Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Even my vagina gasped.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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