i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Randomize
