once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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