For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
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