Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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