He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
