I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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