nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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