Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
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i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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