How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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