What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
