Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Randomize
