Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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